Working Mom

Well it's official as of tomorrow (when I go and get my physical and drug test done at Cargill) that I will be one more step closer to working. My past supervisor Andy called me last Friday asking me if I would be interested in a part-time position in the lab. I quickly accepted and am set for tomorrow to finish the process and get set-up for orientation. I have mixed emotions because I will be putting Taylor in daycare part-time also. He'll be going with Angie and she is really awesome and unique. ;) I know she'll take care of him well and I know she will teach him well too. I was thinking of all the reasons I could come up with about why going to daycare will be good for Taylor and here they are:

1. He will get to play with other kids and develop social skills.
2. He will have another source/type of discipline from Angie. Which will maybe improve his "ways" at home, which I take all credit for. :(
3. It could possible prune him for when he will start school.

Well I guess 3 is all  I could think of, but it's a good 3 reasons! I will admit that I am not the best at disciplining him when I should. Mostly when he says inappropriate things but when to understand it better you would have to understand our family. Jason and I are very inappropriate parents sometimes, like things that would shock other people make us laugh. Like for example if we ask Tyler what he wants to eat for lunch and he says "balls" we think it's funny!!! I know, it's totally weird!! But Jason is weird and he has molded us all into his weirdness!! Yes, I will put most blame on Jason for having a weird family. Because he has pushed me into the crowd! I was like "well if I can't beat em' I might as well join em'!" I don't think it's the worst trait to have in a family and my kids definitely aren't going around cursing other people out! That would for sure be unacceptable! So this is why I think daycare will be benefiting for Taylor because he will be taught structure. Good thing is he won't be going full-time. He will be able to stay with Jason on days Jason is off and I am working. So this settles my anxiety alot! Unfortunately I think he will be going all week next week because mine and Jason's shift will collide!! I'll just keep praying that Heavenly Father give peace and reassurance to me and Taylor as we get into a new routine! I really pray that we get into a groove easily, especially for the kids. All they have known is mommy staying at home, so I hope they won't be shifted and that Jason and the family will step in to help them transition as well. I'm really grateful for this opportunity however as well. I loved doing what I did when I first worked in the lab and my goal the second time around is to be an asset to my supervisor rather than a burden. This will be good for us and the depths we have to pay. I know this is his work and I'll just go as he leads me.

Spring Break has left the building

I took this picture this afternoon after church. I thought it was time for an all kids together picture and it came our wonderful!

So today is Sunday and tomorrow is the last day of Spring Break. I'm still debating what exactly I want to do with my Monday, so far it's either deep clean (which I'm not digging right now) or just kick back and be lazy. Even though being lazy just makes me feel like I wasted a complete day. Who knows, maybe I'll be genius enough to manage a little bit of both into tomorrow. Jason has been on the graveyard shift since Thursday and it's been exhausting trying to keep the kids quite. Usually they're all at school on this shift and it's just Taylor and me, so the volume of the house isn't so loud. But being all the kids are at home for break the volume management has been extreme...along with moods and attitudes. Over all I think our spring break has been a pretty blessed one. Growing up both my parents worked, so usually Jamie baby sat us during our spring breaks when we were all older. I have no idea what they did with us before then, most likely a sitter. Getting to the point we rarely took family trips during this break. Which isn't the worst thing, I think my parents accomplished raising wonderful kids. We all have our own opinion and our frame of mind, but we've done pretty good so far. So I never feel the pressure to take the kids on extravagant trips. Sometimes I think even what we do now for them they sometimes do not appreciate it. So the pressure once again is never there. The most important principle to teach them is that family is priority. So whether it's eating together at dinner time or spending our spring breaks in our wanting home, family is the most rewarding gift. Here are so random pictures I've taken through our spring break. And OH I found my camera! :)

Brooke and Audrey after church. It's important as a parent to control our children's surrounding peers. Audrey is awesome and so is the Roberts family!

Brooke and Zoe our play date at the 7th street park.

They may fight all of the time and make each other cry, but they're brother's and they will always have each others back and pride.

Bucket List

So I am up and should probably be asleep but I just have to many things going on in my mind. For one I am so thankful for Jason's aunt Melanie. I really do believe that God has put her in our life at his timing. I am inspired by her and her willingness to reach out to mine and Jason's marriage. She sent me a book to read (that I am hoping to begin reading the beginning of April, because I am trying to finish up Tim Tebow's memoir "Through My Eyes"). She also sent us a plastic picture frame with the cute saying "I love you today because..." along with a dry erase marker to fill in each day why we love one another. I think it was intended for me to let Jason know why I love him today, but he has jumped in and has written about 3 things about me that he loves and me as well about him. It's genius and it's humility generous and savvy. We hit an itch about a month ago in our marriage and I had a prompting in my heart and mind to reach out to Melanie about my feelings and concerns about mine and Jason's relationship/marriage/friendship. At that time she still gave me wonderful advice and scriptures to strive on and I love that! Her kindness even sent me this book and frame and I haven't even had it for a 24hr period and I'm enjoying it like crazy. This is us Glorifying our Father in Heaven! He loves us all and he wants us to help everyone in need. Reaching out and serving to his other children. :)
      Spring Break has already come to and end, we now have only Saturday (tomorrow), Sunday and Monday with Brooke and Tyler home, so I am hoping to make the best of it. It's been a pretty blessed spring break. We have spent LOTS of time at the parks and we took the kids to Amarillo Wednesday to the Discover Center. They loved it soo much and they each got to pick a souvenir to bring home. Tyler chose a floor puzzle that has wildlife animals on it. Brooke chose an anatomy eyeball that she is still struggling to assemble, I just hope she will keep up with the pieces because it was $20!! Way pricey for my liking.  Then my little Taylor got a dinosaur key chain that roars like...a dinosaur! All in all I had a great time and I think we'll definitely plan more family outings to Amarillo. I really like it there and I am kind of tired of Lubbock. I love memories like this. Unfortunately I lost my camera and I am thinking I left it at the park Tuesday when we spent the afternoon with Lupe, Zoe and family. I'm so bummed but I'll just have to wait for an opportunity to buy another one. I know Jason isn't to happy with me about losing it.
      Speaking of opportunities, I am going tomorrow at 8(am) to Cargill to apply for a part-time position in the lab. My supervisor Andy (he was my supervisor when I worked for him in 2005) called me this afternoon and asked me if I would be interested in this position because he is very short handed.  I really pray that I get this job. Times are weighing down on Jason and I, and I have been thinking and thinking about where I can find a good job. A job that would provide for us but yet enable me to be here for the kids as their mom as well. I trust that Heavenly Father will lead our sweet family where he wants us to be. I loved my job when I worked there from 2005 to 2007. I'm older now and I have experienced alot, so if this job happens for me I am definitely taking care of it. Then maybe I can buy me a new camera :) and pay my college debts.
      On the flipside I've been thinking about making a "Bucket List." There are alot of things I want to accomplish as a person but as a mom. I want to be good at doing lots of things and I want invest my down-time on something benefiting. So here is my right now list:

• I want to learn to sew. Why? Because I want to sew Brooke curtains, I want to make cute shirts (inspiration from a friend on FB who makes the cutest shirts for her girls) and towels, etc. Sewing is a wonderful trait to have and is definitely benefiting. 
• Making home-made tortillas. I know they're not all healthy for you but Jason loves them and let's not forget, my boys are skinny and have little problem pooping. So I really don't think tortillas will be that horrible for them, besides Brooke and I love them. :)

• I want to become a better reader. I started right now, tonight, reading Tim Tebow's memoir. So far it is already wonderful and inspiring. I'll start Melanie's book right after this one. I want to lead my kids in good example and hobbies. So reading is a must too.

• Wow, I can't believe it's so short! I'll have to think more tomorrow because right now I really need to work on resting. So Juno it is!! -Kayla 

     

Sunday Funday

 Today Jason is working the 12 hour shift, so it's been a pretty bumming day. You know with the time change and losing an hour I actually managed to be exactly on time for church today!! I couldn't believe it, I guess I do better with losing time than gaining it. I woke up feeling crabby though. My head was hurting and I either need a new bed or I need to go to the doctor because I wake up almost every morning feeling like I've been working out intensely the day before. It's not normal and I really don't like waking up like that all of the time. My headache still hasn't gone away today even after taking 2 ibuprofen...it simmered it but it didn't fully get

rid of it. Anyways, Taylor and I left church after sacrament being that he was the only one I was going to have in nursery and I felt like my blood was boiling and I felt dizzyish. I was able to squeeze in about a good hour of laying down and dozing in and out of sleep. Mr.Taylor wouldn't let mommy nap today. So Kellie invited Brooke tonight to go to their family Sunday dinner and during that time the boys and I decided to go eat at Sonic. They were going nutts that we were eating inside the car! We took a little drive afterwards and just passed time. I ordered Taylor a hamburger because he is our only one left to try and train to eat hamburgers! The boy tore it up! He loved it and I know Jason is going to be excited to hear that Taylor ate a whole cheeseburger! Brooke and Tyler eat strictly chicken nuggets or strips and it drives us crazy sometimes. Taylor is laying here beside me knocked out and when he looks so peaceful and content, protected it makes me forget how hard it seems sometimes during the day to keep him calm and not whining or crying. I guess this goes for all of the kids. I've been struggling with Brooke and trying to teach her to honor whatever decision we make. She never seems to accept any answer we give her regarding anything. I know I am wrong because I don't always speak kindly to her or softly but it drives me mad when she always thinks that she has to have someone over everyday to play with. I really just need to gather exactly what bothers me most and I think it's the fact that she isn't being respectful. Example, it is spring break week and Kendra asked me to watch Kyra. Brooke got the impression that Kyra was going to be here the whole week, but Kendra called me tonight and told me she wouldn't be coming until Thursday and Friday..Brooke has asked me so many times already when is Kyra coming. I believe if I have already told her Thursday and Friday once that she shouldn't keep on asking me. Call me strict but I just don't like being asked the same thing over and over again.  To make this situation more frustrating she then threw a fit about being bored all spring break because she isn't going to have anyone to play with!!! ;/ Challenges of motherhood. I pray it gets better, I pray to be more kind and I pray for Heavenly Father to strengthen my love and relationship will Brooke, Tyler and Taylor. I enjoyed this Sunday and I wanted to blog it. :)

Blessing's with PePaw

 I feel really blessed that we are able to live with my dad, especially for more reasons that one. My main reason (blessing) is that the kids will have a memory of their grandpa, a relationship. Something I never had with either of mine. Here are some pictures that I was able to take. The top one was when my dad was watching Full Metal Jacket and had the volume at like 60! and yet him and Taylor bother managed to knock out while watching it. The bottom one is of Taylor just clinging to his grandpa while grandma Barbara was visiting! It's fun to watch the kids with their grandparents! I love it.

Texas Public School Week 2012

So it was Texas Public School week last week (and I still don't know exactly what that means) and the kids made paper-mache cows to celebrate it, I'm assuming. They were supposed to be like the cows around Plainview that were decorated according to their sponsors. They're EVERYWHERE! So Brooke decorated her's with her daddy's work, Azteca Milling and yes she drew a corn! She then put Cargill representing Uncle Trenton and beef, a blue bonnet and some other girly things. I was really impressed on how well she painted her cow. Kyra did awesome too! I did help or I did paint their cows white for them. Brooke helped me more than Kyra because Kyra was more interested in playing basketball outside with Jason, Trenton and Jennifer. I didn't mind helping her though. I'm glad we were able to get the cows done before Monday! Brooke's teacher Mrs.Marks had Cooter's brother Mikael come and be their auctioneer. I bought a little girls cow that is in Brooke's class for a $1000! Yup, it was fun. Then on Thursday Jason and I went to eat with Tyler at his kindergarten frito pie cook off. It was fun and my favorite part was the Dr.Peppers and grapefruit. Tyler insisted that Jason and I both be there, so luckily my mom was able to watch Taylor while we went. I would've loved to take Taylor with us but he just doesn't sit still and he wants everything his brother has. So we thought it would be best to leave him so we could enjoy Tyler's meal.  I had a really great time and I love whenever I am able to be there for Brooke and Tyler when they have these type of things going on. I sure hope I get better at! Especially eating lunch with them. I really need to do that more. Anyways here are the pictures.

Brooke and I at Edgemere's 2nd grade Steer Auction. It was totally cute and exciting!

Kyra with her precious piece of Art.

The girlfriends! Brooke, Kyra, Lexi, Layla and Ivoree.

Tyler and I at his "What I love about Texas" lunch.

Jason with Tyler. I love the boys! Taylor was absent, but he was having a blast with grandma Josie!

I thought this sign was awesome cute! I think they did it in Pre-K too!

Sketchy lunch....and Tyler didn't eat. I think I would of preferred it in a bowl.

Catching Up

    I feel like I haven't blogged in forever or I don't blog enough. There is so much going on in our lives all at once. So I'll use this post to catch up on everything, but totally off the topic; I still cannot figure out how to get my blog looking the way I want it too! Bleh! So first is first, Sunday evening my Tia Maria brought my grandma Barbara over to visit us. I must say she looks amazing for 85 years old! Her birthday was February 20th and I wish we grew up closer to her and had a chance to get to know her better, but unfortunately we didn't. Actually the only grandparent I grew up really knowing and spending a lot of time with was my grandma Lita (Manuelita) my mom's mom. Like I said though, my grandma Barbara looks amazing and I know she is amazing. She has over come so many obstacles in her life that she inspires me. My dad tells me stories about her life and how she was always looking and reaching out to care and nurture people. She has over come sickness and surgeries in her life that shows her strength. I know my dad loves his mom more than words can probably express, but I think my dad has a hard time allowing himself to express his emotions. I wish he would try harder to do that for his mom, sister and family but it is his own choice to do so. I just pray that no one will ever doubt his love for them, especially Maria. We are not loving if we doubt others feelings. I'm really glad that Maria brought her to see us, it shows a lot of great character about her.
    Secondly: So I have decided that it is in the best interest of Brooke to permanently terminate Brian's parental rights and to proceed in Jason's adoption for her. I have prayed hard about this and it has taken me over 8 years to come to this decision. I know though that Brian will only disappoint Brooke if I allow him to keep coming in and out of her life and never once explaining to her what he is and what he does. It's will only confuse her, and she has already told me herself that she doesn't want to go with Brian and she wants to stay with us. It's exhausting ever thinking he would ask or expect to take her during spring break, summer-time or any other holiday. During this last phase/stage I have given him the benefit of the doubt but he is apparently going back to his old ways and old girlfriends who only cause friction in our co-parenting (whatever existence our co-parenting is that is). So I stopped talking to him completely and I have an appointment Tuesday with an attorney. People move on and I know Heavenly Father blessed me with Jason for a reason, he is our daddy and our provider and we're working on our protector. :)
    Thirdly: I had an interview this morning at the Wal-Mart DC center her. The position is for order-processing/order-filler. It is something I think I may be capable of doing, but I am nervous about the schedule. It would be a definite blessing if I do get offered a position that would be Tuesday-Friday morning shift. If however I do get offered a second shift position or weekend position that I may just try it out. I worry about the kids though and the life-style change they will have to adjust to. I'm not going to stress it to much though because I am not obligated to take the job and I will not do anything to jeopardize their feelings. :) So this isn't the worst situation that could over take my mind, that is for sure.

    Nothing really has changed in my life. Thank goodness. Jason and I hit a little itch in our marriage a few weeks ago, but it's getting better. We're in this marriage to win it and it is going to take a lot of work and practice from one another. Luckily with our love and commitment I know we'll get through this. We have so much on us, me looking for work, Jason wanting to provide more and not really having the opportunity. What helps me get through these challenges is focus. I know that we are doing what we need to do. We're keeping our marriage and our family in tact and that is what Heavenly Father is wanting us to do. I am at peace where we are at and it's an over all circle of help and endurance. My dad helps us, we help him, I stay home with the kids and they have security in life and eventually Jason and I will stand on our own. It's a sacrifice that I am willing to make for Brooke, Tyler and Taylor because they deserve the BEST!!! - Kayla :)